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Wiki World Wrestling/Week 3

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Opening Segment Edit

The Anarchist, Zealot, The Conspiracy Theorist, The Sadist, Left-Wing Radical, The Unamerican, Born Again, and Klinger are gathered around the ring.

  • OWNER: "Two weeks ago, I kicked off the Extreme Cup. My aim in doing so is to find the best of the best to crown as the inagural Wiki World Wrestling Champions. Here's what I said two weeks ago..."

On the screen, a clip is played of the Owner, from two weeks ago, saying "You maggots are all gathered here for one purpose: winning the Extreme Cup... I'm going to hold a falls count anywhere, no illegal weapons tournament - the first annual Extreme Cup Tournament - to sort the wheat from the chaff. The winner... gets a shot at the Wiki World Wrestling Title, and the Extreme Cup. I'll give the runner-up the Extreme Title. And then those who come 3rd and 4th will get to duke it out for the Extreme TV Title."

  • OWNER: "Well, I gave you all a chance, and you were the guys who couldn't cut the mustard! Well..."
  • CONSPIRACY THEORIST: "Yeah, well some of us didn't 'cut the mustard' - in your words - because you made some of us wrestle our first round in the same week you wanted us to wrestle our second round matches, and set your little puppet, the Working Class Man, against us! Don't think we've forgotten!"
  • OWNER: "Oh no, not this again!"
  • CONSPIRACY THEORIST: "Truth is, you knew all along who you wanted to win your precious little Extreme Cup, and..."
  • OWNER: "SHUT THE FUCK UP! What I bought you out here to tell you is that I'm giving you a second chance! That's right, I need some tag teams to win the Extreme Tag Titles at the pay per view, and the World Tag Titles. And maybe some of you aren't cut out for singles competition. That's fine. You have a chance to prove yourself tonight as a tag team! Well, win this week, and next week, and you'll get that World Tag Title shot. Hell, even if you lose next week, I'll give you an Extreme Tag Title Shot. And yes, that includes you, Conspiracy Theorist!"

...Anyway, on to other business. We have a double main event tonight: the two round three matches in the Extreme Cup. But the good news, for whoever loses between American Patriot Vs. The Enforcer and The Massochist Vs. Working Class Man, is that they get a second chance next week. This is a double chance round..."

  • CONSPIRACY THEORIST: "Oi! Oi! Let us get this straight. If Working Class Man loses tonight, you'll give him ANOTHER CHANCE next week?! So you stacked the deck against me, but..."

Anarchy Alliance (The Anarchist and Zealot) (Loser Match 5 / Loser Match 6) Vs. Sadistic Conspiracy (The Conspiracy Theorist and The Sadist) (Loser Match 7 / Loser Match 8) Edit

  • ANARCHIST: "SHUT THE FUCK UP! It may shock you, Conspiracy Theorist, but no-one cares if you win or lose tonight. We aren't all out to get you, as much as your right-wing conspiracy theories piss me off."
  • OWNER: "Well, Anarchist, you will care tonight; you and the Zealot will wrestle against him! And, in the second tag match, Left-Wing Radical and The Unamerican will face Born Again and Klinger."
  • CONSPIRACY THEORIST: "Which makes my tag team partner?!"
  • OWNER: "Conspiracy Theorist, your tag team partner tonight will be the Sadist."

The Sadist takes advantage of the situation by delivering a pep talk to the Conspiracy Theorist.

  • SADIST: "Conspiracy Theorist, you are right to be suspicious - ESPECIALLY of the team we are fighting tonight! This Anarchist has an agenda - the destruction of Government, world religion, and all business - including Wiki World Wrestling itself! And he's struck up an alliance with the Zealot, whose sole purpose in life is to recruit anyone he can to The Anarchists' Conspiracy. Who knows how many they've recruited already?! And keep in mind, last week, it was you, the Clone, and me who were subjected to the 'two matches in one night' conspiracy. I don't know about you, but hearing about these conspiracy puts me in the mood to INFLICT! SOME! PUNISHMENT!"

The Conspiracy Theorist strikes the Anarchist and the match begins. Owner, Left-Wing Radical, The Unamerican, Born Again, and Klinger clear away from the ring.

Winner: Anarchy Alliance (The Anarchist and Zealot) (Loser Match 5 / Loser Match 6)

The Comrades (Left-Wing Radical and The Unamerican) (Loser Match 1 / Loser Match 2) Vs. Born Again Friends (Born Again and Klinger) (Loser Match 3 / Loser Match 4) Edit

  • LEFT WING RADICAL: "Hey there, Klinger, we couldn't help to notice what you said, two weeks ago, on this very show..."

On the screen, some footage plays of Klinger from 2 weeks ago, saying "Hi there, Mr. Enforcer. You seem very... 7ft tall. Well, I just want to ask you to take pity on me. You see, growing up I didn't have many friends and... and I'm trying to make some friends and I would be sooo glad to call you a friend of mine that..."

  • KLINGER: "It's true, I've never really had a friend in my life. My Mom and Dad abandonned me. Through school, I was always the outcast. I was rejected for being Antisocial. Really, I would do anything to have a friend I could truely call my own."
  • LEFT WING RADICAL: "Well, we want to be your friends. Or, more precisely, Klinger, your Comrades."
  • THE UNAMERICAN: "Absolutely, Klinger. The first step for you is to renounce this country which, from the sounds of, you don't fit into, and never have. This country and it's stupid norms and conventions..."
  • LEFT WING RADICAL: "And it's capitalism!"
  • THE UNAMERICAN: "Damn straight. And secondly, you have to join us in our push to overthrow the crooked system and its even more crooked culture. Which means renouncing that dumb-ass born again Christian you're tagging with tonight, who - frankly - represents all the social norms that made you life so far a living hell!"
  • BORN AGAIN: "Are you listening to this garbage? Klinger, if you want a friend, I can introduce you to the greatest friend..." *Klinger turns on Born Again and hits him*
  • BORN AGAIN: "That's it. I will all make you suffer for all eternity."

Winner: The Comrades (Left-Wing Radical and The Unamerican)

Disillusioned Soul Vs. Clone Edit

Liberty Vs. The Skeptic Edit

Extreme Cup, Round 3: Match 13 Edit

Extreme brackets 5

AMERICAN PATRIOT: "Let me tell you people about the American Dream. Two weeks ago, I overcame an Unamerican who questioned the American Dream. Last week, I overcame the Skeptic, whose subconscious self doubt led him to question my commitment to the American Dream. This week, I will show, once and for all my commitment to the American Dream; the dream that, through hard work and determination, you can achieve anything. Even beat a giant. Which is why tonight, I will beat the very giant that no Disillusioned Soul or Antisocial klinger could overcome. Tonight, I will prove my committment to the American Dream."

American Patriot (Winner, Match 9) Vs. The Enforcer (Winner, Match 10).

Winner: American Patriot

  • AMERICAN PATRIOT: "There. That's how you reach for the American Dream. That's how you beat... a giant. *catches breath* And if I can beat the biggest guy in the federation, then heaven help whoever stands between me and the title. And that means either Working Class Man, or the Massochist, next week. Well, just letting you guys know, while I'll be watching you guys duke it out from ringside this week, I'll return next week to destroy the winner, and take what's rightfully mine. God Bless America."

American Patriot rolls out of the ring and grabs a chair ringside, as the competitors enter for the next match.

Extreme Cup, Round 4: Match 14 Edit

The Massochist (Winner, Match 11) Vs. Working Class Man (Winner, Match 12).

Winner: Working Class Man

  • WORKING CLASS MAN: " Hey, American Patriot, you want to talk about fighting against adversity? In spite of the rants of the Conspiracy Theory nutcase, I wrestled - and won - twice last week on the back of my own hard work, and I won again tonight. And, given that I'm facing The Enforcer next week, to any seven foot giants watching, I say KISS MY ASS!"

Enforcer runs down the ring, and begins brawling with Working Class Man. American Patriot jumps into the ring, and begins fighting both The Enforcer, and Working Class Man. While they grapple, The Massochist, who is gets up, before being pushed in the back by American Patriot. All four then begin brawling, while referees and officials flood the ring to break them up, as the show goes off the air.

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