Mage/2
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[edit] Divine Intervention
[edit] Starlight falls asleep
Darkness had descended, the party was over, and it was time to go home. Even though they didn't have much fun, Starlight didn't think of it as a day wasted. They returned home in mediocre spirits, as they realized that the day was gone and that the next time they would meet all together like this would likely be a month from now. The adults said good-bye, and they departed for home, walking in three groups into the growing darkness. The cycle was complete; night had triumphed over day; and it would be only a few hours before the cycle would begin all over again. She had better get some sleep, so she proceeded to her bedroom, looked at the open book on the table with a disparaging glance, shuddered, and fell into bed.
Sleep dulled her senses quickly, before she even knew that it had happened, and suddenly, she was reeling away from the real world, losing contact, faster and faster, dizzy with the excitement of exploring another figment of her dreamscape, falling helplessly into the twilight realm of dreams...
Her parents, telling her to keep working so hard as she had never done, for great good must come out of it; her own hatred of the books sitting on the table; the match under her bed and only an arm's length away; Andrew telling her that she had to fulfill her dreams; An telling her to take a chance; An striking the branch of the paper-tree with ease from yards away; her failing the examination at age fourteeen; her parents crying as she had never seen them do before, and even more childish than she was; marrying at sixteen with someone who valued her for her body and not for her soul; watching tranquilly as the stack of paper-leaves were consumed by fire in front of her; falling into a spiritual abyss, the grounds of no return. The images swirled through her sleepy mind, telling her about the past, the present, and the future. What path she had to take kept flickering in her mind; she probed as she explored into the various futures open to her, yet with no avail; none of the options seemed attractive, not yet...
[edit] A new day, another hope
She seemed to awaken from the swirling images with an immensely dissatisfying yet vague sense of deja-vu:
Dawn rose. It creeped up, a bit at a time, and light streaked in from far away toward the horizon. A thin streak of crisp, golden light shone in through the window and formed a growing line of light on the opposite wall. Brightness began to effuse throughout the room, and night, tired of its hours of dominion over the sleepy home, began losing its cosmic battle against the day. Gradually, it dispersed, giving ground, unwillingly, knowing that as she left, as Night left, and Day took over, the people in this cozy home would be awakened, against their will, to rise up and do the chores of living that they would have to do. Yet she could not turn the tide; in time, as time continued to turn its inevitable cycles, Day became stronger and Night became weaker. She did not abandon the ground to him immediately; yet it was inevitable, it would soon end, and nearby Starlight was still dreaming in her world as her body felt around, eager for more rest, despising the dawn of another day, yet her spirit groaned the opposite; it wanted to become active, to do something meaningful, some action, no matter how tiny, that, with its completion, would signify her manifestation in the world.
For that was what she had to do. She had put off the inevitable long enough; now was the time for the fateful decision. It was the first morning of the first day of Starlight as eleven years old, a most unusual number; what she had been told was right for the previous ten years had fallen apart in the last one year, and the ten and one were now equal, both being equally viable (or un-viable) options. Would she be able to summon her inner strength to break free, as Andrew and An had advised? At least now, even she didn't know. Yet if she didn't do so now, she would have to do so later.
[edit] Starlight qualms over the status quo
For Starlight had not run away last night, but had instead succumbed to the need to respect the status quo: to remain, and keep on doing what she had done for the years before: obeying her parents, continuing the age-old tradition of respecting one's elders. But what about her peers? Where they to be discounted, were they nothing in anyone else's eyes? The god of the law would soon decide.
One day more had passed; another twenty-four hours of indecision. That translated to yet another day and twenty-four hours of wasted time, when she could have been doing something better, something that she could more closely connect to; something she could cherish, and enjoy. Instead, the day of the next examination was arriving swiftly, and she had used up another day. Time was dripping on. Time was dripping on, despite her lack of consent.
But what would she do, if she decided to abandon her home, her parents, and her current way of life? Now, at least, she had her Fehu: something valuable to live with, if not the best; something to keep her alive, to sustain her, if not to satisfy her. Out there, in the wilderness, an empty nothingness pervaded; the Uruz of lacking and abandonment, of a driving for change at once both self-destructive and indeterminate. The situation, the overwhelming Thurisaz, was not communicable by words; yet there was no avoiding it; it was a choice she would have to make. All three of these glyphs seemed to conspire against her. It was much too uncomfortable for her; once again she felt the need, that primordial instinct, to manifest her presence in the real world.
[edit] Starlight wakes up once again
She opened her eyes. Starlight remained in her bed, tranquil and blinking her eyes to adjust to the brightness, which was with every passing second growing brighter and brighter. The moments of idleness passed, dropping away into the past slowly, slowly... Starlight aroused herself yet once more, and pulled herself from her comfort in her bed. Life was going on; she was awake.
This time, however, things would not be the same. She had grown by too much for that much-hated past to stay.
The next few minutes found her reading the books in front of her once again, in preparation for when her parents would come back and check on her. She looked at the books one more time: just the covers and then skimming through the pages, looking for anything of interest to her. Thousands of pages of text to read. So much to learn. Three years to cover the material and attempt to win the game, or lose it, and be left with nothing. That didn't leave much choice, except that she didn't have to play the game. Nothing. There was nothing interesting in that entire body of several works, absolutely nothing to capture her interest; she was tired out just from scanning the material. Maybe I could actually learn this material, she thought, if only I had a demonstration of how powerful this knowledge could be.
[edit] Starlight decides not to be a priestess
It certainly couldn't compare with the magic that An had showed her last night. That was what she wanted to do when she grew up. The rest was just distraction. A great diversion that had lasted three years, and drained her of much of her childhood. The time of reckoning was come. She would strike out from what was accepted, and forge her own being; she would break from the established pattern and create her own way of things. No god ever said that the current way of existence for her was the just one; there were many opportunities that she could try out.
And she knew just what she wanted to do. And it certainly wasn't to become village priestess. No, the visit last night and the demonstration by An showed her what the world held, what was achieveable. In a single action, it had blown away all the aged and time-worn statements and beliefs that her parents had tried to pound into her. Now, at least, she could be free.
Starlight stooped down under her bed and retrieved the small matchbox. It was nearly full. Taking one in her hand, she looked around to make sure that her parents weren't about to return. Assured that no such thing could happen, she carried the books outside the rear door into the open and dry air and scrambled the pages and books so that it would burn easily. She couldn't simply leave the books unrazed, or otherwise she would be enticed to return, to please her parents. It had to be all-out, or nothing.
[edit] Starlight sets her books aflame
She had changed into her favorite dress, a flowery one featuring lotuses; aside from her clothing and her shoes, she wore nothing else, no decoration. In her purse she had placed the necessary items for immediate survival: some bread, a gourd filled with water, and some assorted coins that she had managed to accrue as her allowance. Soon it would be time to venture forth, out into the open; she did not want to leave without everything she needed. Satisfied, after checking her materials over and over again, she took the match and matchbox, lighted the books with one of them, and stashed the box into her purse.
And here was the first, most primordial of magics: the creation of fire, both the first and the last, the ability to create, and the ability to destroy; the power of life imbued into the visible world, first among the majestic achievements. It was the first, uncertain step that she took; yet it was the most important one. The fire grew steadily, gradually scorching first a few pages, then engulfing the books altogether. The flames flickered red and orange and yellow in front of her bedazzled eyes; she was attracted to its lively dance; she knew not how long she was there, but it did not matter; she watched intently as the licks of flame bore through page after page, turning each and every one of them into a fine, black crisp.
There was no turning back.
Yet I didn't need to. I had, with this action, freed myself from the captivity that had held me here for so long. Now, I could venture out into the open world, with the stars beckoning over the sky and the horizon the possibility. My future is a clean sheet of paper-leaf, and my destiny whatever I choose to write on it from now hence.
[edit] The Departure
[edit] Starlight looks into the river
Starlight gazed out toward the horizon, where the water was glistening with the hope that she had within her that she was doing the right thing. Behind her was the village; there were the people she had known, some for all of her life; there were those places that she knew, that she trusted, that she could call home.
Before her, and still so far away that they were invisible, were others that she had not yet seen and who she may not want to see, and maybe those she did want to see after all. There were also those places which were foreign to her, in which she would not be welcome, and which may or may not try to repulse her.
And she was on the top of a cliff protruding into the great river before her, overlooking the nearest waters; she could see land on the other side, and yet knew that those places were still too close, that she had to venture farther, beyond them, then farther still. The winds of change were indeed blowing here; here lotus dress was blowing wildly around her. The winds carried the edges and folds of her clothing forward, and attempted to move her; yet she stood. A gust blew by, and with it carried Starlight's long dark hair up and straining forward, wisping by her face in a frenzied dance of excitement.
[edit] Starlight pays the boatman for a ride
Never had she felt so free. And freer still she must become, or she would be a slave to her past again.
She stepped down the cliff, looked back upon the beckoning village, and approached the local boatman. She tapped the boatman on the shoulder, and while she brushed her flowing hair aside, the boatman glanced over his other shoulder, before discerning that Starlight was actually on the proper side and whirling back to greet her.
Starlight held up a solitary silver coin toward the sky so that it sparkled and shone.
When the local boatman realized that Starlight meant to go practically alone, with only the boatman to accompany her, he began to sputter protests, but she cut his words off by shyly taking out a silver coin. Then in an alluring voice, she proclaimed to him, almost in a whisper, while holding out the silver coin: "If you would take me up to Lads, I'll give you this silver coin, and another one to keep quiet about what I'm doing here."
"Erm... well, you see,.. well, all right, all right, I'll take you there." In reality Starlight wasn't even expecting any doubt at all. Silver coins weren't easy to come by, especially not for a three-day trip to Lads. It was an offer that the man couldn't refuse, and they both knew it.
[edit] They travel up the river
After paying him the silver coin, Starlight entered the boat, and the boatman began to row her upstream. During that time, Starlight looked back upon the settlement where she had stayed for almost all of her life as it receded into the distance, becoming smaller and smaller but never fully vanishing...
On both sides, the lush greenery of the bush grasses and carpet grasses was immediately apparent, enclosing the two travellers from the hills on the river banks. Soon the banks rose higher and higher until Starlight, from her low viewing point on the boat, could no longer see the tops of the hills. Steep cliffs soon hung on both sides. Through this long voyage, an attempt to quickly get as far away from her home as possible so that she could not return even if she could, Starlight watched as the bright white clouds sailed overhead, as the waters passed her underneath. A small, turbulent but nearly silent wake trailed behind their wooden craft as they sailed upstream. At several points they stopped to take a rest on the river banks; each time the shadow cast by the banks became longer, as the sun steadily rose into its apex and then sank back down, exuding the life-force of Viva and the brute-force of Orsinius.
[edit] Morning turns into evening
Starlight had already pondered where she was going. She would seek out a mage clan from the north, and become a part of their organization, away from society so that she would not be discovered. It was likely that the recruiters would be at a town like Lads rather than a village like Bahasa; there wouldn't be quite as many people to recruit at the latter. But for the moment, she kept the thought to herself.
The golden sun touched the lavender horizon, and steadily began to sink below the surface of the world, casting enormous purple shadows across the river and its banks. On both sides, grasslands were replaced by maple and oak trees, enormous beings rising up and groping for the sky. Starlight felt minute beside the immensity of the verdure that ensheathed the flowing river. Beside her, as she leaned over the edge of the boat to look below, a similar, beautiful face looked upward at her, toward the darkening sky, and shimmered in the water.
The river darkened, as did everything else around the two. Even so, Starlight's hopes warmed; she was, with every passing moment, inching closer to her first destination outside of Bahasa. She would like to entirely forget the latter, and as the sun set at last to her left, she laid down in the boat and watched the stars twinkling above. "I came out here because of your guidance," she told them in a whisper; "And now I'll need your guidance yet again." She continued to gaze upward, toward the sky, which had turned entirely black, waiting for some signal.
[edit] Starlight wonders about her parents
She received none. "Maybe the stars didn't hear me," she thought to herself. "So I'll tell them again." Fixing her gaze on the stars yet again, she whispered, this time louder than before: "I came out here because of your guidance, and now I'll need your guidance yet again as I search for a mage clan to join." The boatman turned to face her, half expecting something unusual to happen--these people were still superstitious, even though the existence of magic was proven by many--but upon seeing, and remembering, that Starlight was merely a child of eleven, he turned back to his work.
Starlight wondered what her parents must be thinking of now. They would have realized that she had been missing, but then they would have seen the books that they had so painstakingly bought for her, turned into ashes, and would have blamed her for all their travails and the failure of their hopes and dreams. They would have deemed her unworthy of being their child, unworthy of being associated with them; they would have regretted holding that birthday party, which was so crucial to her understanding of her situation; they would have cursed her for abandoning them so, after all the plentiness of food, loving, and shelter they had provided her; they would...
Starlight shut out such thoughts immediately; it was too hard for her to bear them. She thought of the other responses that her parents could have had: relief, that she had left them; happiness, that they understood her need to go visit the rest of the world and find her true place, her niche; and anguish. It all came back to that utter anguish of knowing, after it was too late, that one's only child had sought to abandon one's family, to flee from home, to imply no matter how indirectly that somehow, they were at fault for not making their home as welcoming and as bearable as they should have, as almost every other family has been able to do. Frustrated, Starlight steeled her concentration to the fact that what she was doing was necessary, and far more important than any emotions that her parents were to experience; that this was her destiny, and, as An said, she had to stretch out for it, to pull it toward her no matter how hard it would be. So she shut out the thoughts of her parents' sadness and anger, broke her empathic connection to them, and strengthened her resolve to push onward, knowing, as she knew for certain, that there was now no turning back, whatever was to happen afterward.
[edit] Song of the wanderer
Starlight, in her relaxed position in the boat, and looking up to the stars, began to sing:
Oh what path should I take?
Oh what will I do now?
There was a time when the answer
Was shining up high.
But now there seems to be no answer,
No guiding light to follow at all--
And when I ask to the stars high above,
They too give no reply at all.
Well then what do I do next?
I pose this to any who know--
Whether it be what I've done before,
Or something different,
It would be a joy to try it out,
To know that someone knows what to do--
And when things go well, as they should,
Then my soul and I would be at peace.
But now there seems to be no answer,
No guiding light shining the way.
No reply to my earnest question,
Nothing to hold on to.
It seems so simple to those who know;
It seems so hard to those who don't;
But when all's said and done,
There must be a way,
And all I have to do is find it.
[edit] Raido
[edit] The Wanderer
[edit] Starlight decides to land ashore
It may have been just her imagination, but the stars in the sky seemed to smile at her. They arranged themselves into the shape of a smile composed of many twinkling stars, and then into an arrow pointing down to a river bank. Starlight's gaze followed the unusual shape of the stars, thinking to herself that it must be that the stars were answering her hopes now; she traced out the stars with her hand--how bright they were! They cast a gleam upon the dark waters of the Oraganta River at night, sparkling dots both above and below, in the sky and in the streams. Starlight took it on faith and told the boatman in half a whisper, yet breaking the half silence of the stream: "Let us go there to take a break."
The boatman readily consented. He had been paddling onward that entire day, and as soon as Starlight spoke, he was eager to reach land. Then he could rest and not fear the boat going back downstream. He could sleep. And here the river banks were gradual, not cliff-like as they were earlier that evening. It would make a prime time to take a break. Thus, he gradually changed the path of the boat, arcing toward the side of the river and preparing to land.
Even before they landed, Starlight was convinced that it was destiny that told her to temporarily stop her journey here. It was pitch-black outside, with nothing but the stars and the bright round orb of the moon lighting the way; yet it was enough. The boatman didn't know, but then he shouldn't; such messages were only for those who felt it deeply to notice. There, surrounded by the darkess of the night and by the shades of the nearby forest, was a young boy. He was smiling. Starlight couldn't see that, but she could feel it, so she smiled back. The boy waved his hands silently. It's Andrew, Starlight realized. What's he doing here?
[edit] Starlight reunites with Andrew
The boatman was eagerly making a fire with the help of a firestone. He did not notice that Starlight had disappeared... or more specifically, went to the edge of the forest where Andrew was waiting. The two looked at each other. "What are you doing here?" she asked.
"Same as you're doing, I guess. Running away from home."
"You too?" Starlight could scarcely believe it. Whereas she had a dismal future ahead of her, Andrew was prepared to be a mage.
"Well, after we went home I decided that I couldn't simply let you leave like that, and never see or hear from you again, so I ran to An's house. He was worried too, and had been expecting me, you see. So then we departed for Grace's house, to tell her about what we were thinking of. She too agreed, and so it was arranged that we'd all run away, but not together. I was to run away first. So early this morning when my parents and I went to the stall to buy some trinkets, I slipped away and told a stranger to tell my parents that he had seen the local guard abduct me." He chuckled. "I wonder what they'll be thinking now, if they asked around and the stranger told them my story."
[edit] Andrew confesses his plan
Starlight smiled. "Very charming move right there, Andrew. I'm very happy that you've thought about me last night."
"Not just last night, today and tonight as well," Andrew replied. "I've had to get going in a rush, and carry as few belongings as I could. But this will be exciting, won't it? The four of us, exploring the wilds like this, with no care in the world except ourselves and each other."
"Of course it is! ...But when will the others be coming?"
"Two days from now, An is going to disappear. He's going to--and this is interesting, all right--going to make it appear as if he's abducting Grace. Then that way it'll be three incidents, rather than four, which will be more suspicious."
"Wow, you guys have got it all figured out."
"Of course. We're not children any more, you know. We're teenagers."
[edit] Starlight bades the boatman farewell
"An is. You're not." Starlight gave him a meaningful look, but one that said, "I'm just playing with you."
"What about the boatman?" Starlight asked.
"Oh, he's heard our conversation all right, at least some parts of it. You had better send him off soon, with the possibility of getting another silver coin sometime in the future when you're 'done', so that he doesn't spill his secrets out."
Starlight looked overhead. The trees covered the sky in a great canopy, so that the stars were barely visible. But that didn't matter: she had her best friend with her, and that was a star in itself. And, she added, brighter than the others, for he was closer.
After paying the boatman off, Starlight and Andrew sat down by the riverside fire that the boatman's firestone had lighted. They both had brought some food with them, and so they proceeded to eat their dinner. "So what's my parents been saying, once they realized that I had left?" Starlight asked.
[edit] The two chat alone in the forest
"Well, actually I had left before you did, I figure. So no, I didn't know what your parents were doing."
"You're teasing me, aren't you?" Starlight nudged him, and Andrew smiled.
"Well, if I did lie, then I'll still be keeping it, won't I? I guess it'll just have to be a mystery for now."
"Uernnn," Starlight said as she nudged him again, this time a bit harder, but still playful. "Tell me!"
"No really, I don't know, Star, so quit asking!" Andrew moved over slightly, obviously discomforted by the tone of Starlight's voice. "But we only have to keep waiting for two days, that's the good part; after that, Andrew and Grace will have caught up with us, and we can hear the full story. Then we can depart for Lads."
"Okay, but what are we going to do in the meantime?"
Andrew looked at her, more than half-seriously: "Hope that the wolves don't get us, keep this fire going, have a good sleep, and build a raft. We can't swim upstream all the way to town."
Starlight looked away, blushing. She wanted to know the answer, but didn't really want it to be that. It was too harsh, too explicit. After all, this place was wolf country.
[edit] Into the Darkness
[edit] The two friends bicker
"Don't blame me! I came here to get you so that we could wait for the others!" answered Andrew, defending himself from Starlight's accusation.
"Don't blame you? We're children and this is wolf country and we're going to get killed!" Starlight was vehement.
"Hey, it's just as much your fault that you didn't recall that fact until just about now!" Andrew replied angrily.
"Oh so it's my fault. Right!" Starlight stormed away from him, and in about ten steps realized that she was walking straight at the nearby overhanging cliff. She turned around, face gone completely pink: "You think that was funny?"
"What, almost walking into a cliff? Of course it's funny." He said it with no glee, only with a resounding anger in his voice.
Starlight came back to him, eyes angry and watery at the same time. "How could you--Andrew--you--I thought we were friends! How you've changed in so short a time--"
"Well who asked you to get so angry at me??"
"Oh that's right, still my fault. Gerr!"
[edit] The friends resolve their anger
Andrew stopped speaking for a moment. He sat down beside the fire, even though he was getting very hot. He looked, nay, stared, intently at the fire, but kept his thoughts on his friend--his best friend. What had happened? He couldn't go on arguing like this, but he didn't want to give in, either--it was not his fault, so he had no reason to take the blame for it.
Starlight was still standing, on the opposite side of the fire, looking at him intently, fire in her eyes, waiting for him to make a move or say anything so that the words that she had formed at the tip of her tongue could come flying out and lambast him.
But he refused to speak. Suddenly, things seemed so much quieter. Aside from the gushing water at the edge of the river bank, and the steady crackling of the fire that separated them, there was only the sound of the occasional insect and rustling breeze.
Starlight took a deep breath, and tried to let her anger go. The person before her was her best friend, and if she were to lose him, then the rest of the world wouldn't matter quite as much any more. How she longed for Andrew to still be her friend!
[edit] The friends return to peace
Gradually, their excited breaths became softer and slower. Their heads became cleared out of their charged emotions and the passion of their anger toward each other. So they were still friends. Neither had harmed the other; the shouting was all. Things could maybe get better. Starlight took a tentative step forward, closer to the fire. Andrew, still sitting on the other side, tried to formulate something to say. "Am I okay?" he asked.
Starlight paused; she did not know how to reply. "I... guess so," was all that she could produce. But that was enough, however scant in wording it was; it meant most of a world to them. The two were friends once again, and this time, nothing could pull them away from each other. Andrew stretched out one hand to her, beckoning that she come closer. "I'm sorry," he said. "It was my fault. I should have stopped you from letting the boatman go."
"No, it's okay. It was the right thing to do. We were supposed to be with each other and no one else was supposed to be here." She looked at him quietly, then took a soft step around the fire, toward him. "Don't feel bad. It was my fault. I'm sorry, too." Andrew looked at her and her change of tone appreciatively, and opened both arms wide.
They hugged, and as they did so it were as if they had squeezed a lemon, and the sharp and acidic tears coursed down their cheeks. "We'll stick together from now on," they promised to each other silently and inwardly; "we've gotten through this, and it has made our bond stronger."
[edit] Starlight ponders on friendship
A few minutes later the two were busy at work gathering more twigs and branches to fuel the fire. They kept some spares, just in case the fire was about to die down without their noticing. "Wild beasts are afraid of fire," Starlight's parents had told her. "To them, holding a torch is like pointing a loaded bow at them." Now, such statements were being put to the test. Now, those words held an importance. The two kept a look-out for each other, which was hard in the depth of night, when the two should have been fast asleep; but the power of having company, and of working toward a common goal with another soul, and the power to keep going, to not quit at the first moment, drove them on beyond their normal strength, and hardened their resolve to push further.
"We come to each other, in peace, not in anger," Andrew stated at last.
"Yes. We'll always be best friends, won't we, as we have ever since we first met each other" Starlight replied. Then she just remembered: "How did you come to me anyway? I mean today."
[edit] The two muse about the stars
"Well, erm..." Andrew paused, confounded. How did he? He had come to this place by the river because he had followed a strange pattern in the stars. "The stars."
Starlight looked surprised. "You saw them too?"
"Yeah, er.. wait a minute, what do you mean, the stars were what brought us together?"
"That'll be pretty, won't it?"
"But... I was in the forest, and so supposedly I shouldn't have been able to see any stars in the sky, because the trees would have been in the way." Andrew was even more confused. "Come to think of it, the stars were flying right over me, all the time, though the place was so dark I couldn't have noticed the difference. Well,... That's strange..."
"It is indeed. Listen. Did you bring anyone else with you? Could anyone have followed you?"
"Erm, no, not that I would have known."
"But then that's the strange part, isn't it? Why would we be brought together by stars? Even if it was magic, and we were just pawns. It's queer, all right."
[edit] The two suspect a spellcaster is near
Andrew was at first startled, but that quickly turned into a snaring look on his face as he whispered to Starlight: "Magic? Why, that must be it... It seems like we're going to be visited by someone besides wolves."
He took up the nearest torch, and whirled around to face the forest, the burning branch bright in his hand.
Nothing. Nothing but the shadows of himself and of Starlight.
Starlight was afraid now. "I wish I had some of that magic with me," she uttered, a bit unsettled, just as her friend beside her was.
The darkness seemed to respond in kind; it may have grown darker, but the youngsters were concentrated at the expanse of wood.
"Who's there?" Andrew called out into the pitch black darkness.
