Mates forever series; Jannie; 1. Fields of glitter.
“Hurry up!” called out Janet, as her over-weight sister Tammy walked towards her.
“Settle down Janet,” said Tammy. “I just had to grab another CD.” She pulled the shiny cases out of her bag. Radiohead. Siggur Ross. The Boat People. Oh! God! Embarrassment city. Didn’t her sister have the ability of TASTE?
“Just hurry up!” called Janet, unhappy. “I’m tired of shopping.”
“OK,” said Tammy. “Let’s go home”
Walking through the shops, towards the exit, Janet was reminded of walking out of her house, to move to her new house. They were now living in the middle of nowhere, a very boring middle of nowhere. As her mate Lizzy would have said; BORE-O ALERT! Suddenly Janet had found herself with no mate, and nowhere to chill. Pulled away from all her mates that she’d known through from grade one to now, in grade eight. Life was so unfair.
Suddenly, Janet realised they had stopped walking. She looked at her sister.
“Don’t worry, I won’t be long. I just wanted to look for a book,” said Tammy.
Great. Sister speak for – I’ll take for-uber-ever.
“Fine,” sighed Janet, giving up, as Tammy walked into the bookshop to find her book. As she was watching her sister, she caught sight of some of the teenage fiction. Those girls were so beautiful and perfect. So lovely and skinny, with elegant rib bones. Janet pinched her own stomach, sadly. She had put on so much weight. Suddenly there was a noise. Janet turned. Standing behind her were three of the most pretty girls she had ever seen. One was white, one was aboriginal, and one was Japanese. That just goes to show how multicultural a place Australia is. Suddenly a tall woman with shaved legs and large bosom walked past, leaving the smell of a delightful fragrance. The black girl sniffed the air.
“What is that perfume, girlfriend?”
“I don’t know,” said the Japanese girl. “Do you know what it is Sammy?”
“I don’t know,” said Sammie. “It smells like Pervious De’jouce #4”
“Actually,” said Janet, speaking out, “It’s #5.”
Slowly the entire group turned to look at her. Their eyes were dark and piercing.
“Wow,” said Sammy. “I love a girl who knows her perfumes. What’s your name?”
“I’m Janet,” said Janet, almost shyly.
“Janet… Interesting name… How about you come hang with us… Jannie?”
“I’d love to, she said.
“Come on,” said Sammy, grabbing her arm and pulling her along. They were walking through the plaza.
“OK, Jannie, these are my mates. This is Josie. She’s a native Australian,” said Sammy.
“Abo,” giggled the Japanese girl. Josie gave her a playful smack on the head.
“This is Mika,” said Sammy. “She’s a Japanese Australian.”
“Connichi wa,” said Jannie.
“Hi,” Said Mika.
They stopped at a railing, looking over the water. Mika pulled a packet of cigarettes out of her pocket. “Anyone want a slick-stick?” asked Mika, offering the packet. Everyone took one, except for Jannie.
“Don’t you want one?” asked Sammy.
“Aren’t they, like bad for you?” asked Jannie.
“Sort of,” said Josie. “They’re like, full of bad stuff and stuff, but they only really do anything when you’re old. Plus if you give them up within five years, you can undo all the damage. It’s been clinically proven”
“Doesn’t one smoke make you addicted though?” asked Jannie.
“My sister gave them up cold turkey. Twice. She can do it whenever she wants. Do you want one?”
Jannie hesitated, but them again, everything was new. New place, new friends. She may as well have some new experiences. She took a cigarette.
“Light me up,” she said.
“Light-O alert!” said Mika, pulling out a silver lighter and lighting everyone’s cigarettes. They took a drag. Jannie coughed.
“It’s OK,” said Sammy. “It can take a little while to get used to it. You just have to get used to it.”
They kept smoking, and Jannie did find that the longer she did it, the easier it was.
“So where are you from?” asked Sammy.
“Near Brisbane,” replied Jannie. Sammy was staring at her face.
Uh-Oh, Hell-o. She’s realised how dripdorkatious I look.
Sammy’s eyes lit up.
“I’ve got the perfect-o thing for you babe,” she said, and reached into her shopping bag, pulling out a container of bod-ee glittah. She put some on her finger.
“Now stay still,” said Sammy.
She started to slide it on under her eyes, then pulled back, looking at her work.
“Beautiful!” Sammy gasped.
“Simple B!” cried Mika.
“Oh my God, yes!” yelled Josie, diving into her bag. She pulled out a Simple B lipstick.
“Put it on!” yelled Mika. Josie quickly added the lipstick.
“Wow,” said Sammy. “Sexy.”
“Tha…” Jannie began saying, but Sammy cut her off.
They all went silent as three boys walked past. One turned slightly to look at Jannie. He grinned at her.
“Who were they?” asked Jannie.
“Bradley, Mark and Tom. The one who was totally into you – That was Mark And the one tall one with black hair – that was Tom. He’s mine,” said Sammy.
“You… you think he likes me?” asked Jannie.
“Of course. He’s totally fish-hook-up-ed to you. Of course you could help things along a little,” said Sammy.
“How?” asked Jannie.
“Well… A bit of skin never hurt,” said Sammy. “I mean… slirts are kinda wack.”
“Slirts?” Asked Jannie, confused.
“Sleeved shirts. Come on. We have to go shopping, girl!”
With that, Sammy grabbed Jannie’s hand and ran off pulling her towards the shops. They entered a store called REPPALS.
“Hey!” called Sammy, to the shop assistant.
“Yes, how can I help you?” said the shop assistant.
“I would like something super-uber-sexy for this lovely lass here,” said Sammy. The Sales assistant looked Jannie up and down and a little to the left.
“I don’t think we’ve got anything in your size,” said the Sales Assistant.
“Don’t worry, she’s on a diet,” said Sammy. Jannie shot her a questioning look, but Sammy ignored it. “Just find something uber-erotica.”
The sales assistant let the girls to a set of cloths at the back of the store.
“Oh wow!” cried, Sammy looking at the row of shirts. She plucked one off the shelf.
“Like, something totally like this would be Zippo!” said Sammy. “I wonder if they have any that show your nipples more.”
“Ahh…” said Jannie. “I don’t think my mum would like it.”
Oh-wu No-wu! Now they all KNOW what a Square squareazoidbot she was.