Ten people stood.
First Uneven Non PrimeEdit
Unfortunately one of them died. Fortunately this increased the area each person had by 1/9. Unfortunately, the ground was slowly being consumed by a ever growing nanobot swarm! Fortunately this was all relative so the amount of space loss was quite negligible, leading their 1/9 to become 10000/89999. Unfortunately this didn't stop the nanobots, and since the numbers of nanobots increased exponentially, soon they would devour all the 9/9s. Fortunately the nanobots constructed more land, thus creating a limit so that they could never devour all of their 9/9s. Unfortunately, in their mindless quest to create more ground, the nanobots would soon consume the nine remaining people. Fortunately the nanobots tracked the genetic information and so while devouring the nine people and the one dead person, they created more so that they never consumed all the people. Unfortunately, a malfunction in the nanobots circuits made them fuse the genetic material of the people and create a good looking hermaphrodite blondie with brown streaks, a IQ of 80 and six fingers on each foot, the nanobots then started to follow a programation loop and consume and recreate themselves ad infinitum.
Fortunately the excess was left so that by the end of a really long time, the nanobots reconfigured back into eight people, and two dead people. Unfortunately, at least, that was what they would do if they weren't stuck in a programming loop. Fortunately nanobots are programmed and were stuck in a loop, and when they reconfigured back to the state before they began configuring(only leaving the excess as a rotting body), eight people were left to stand in peace. Unfortunately, the eight people were getting tired from so much time standing around. Fortunately, they were members of the Con'gon'goofel clan, so they were more then apt to standing motionless for a period of time. Unfortunately, this also meant that they were extremely allergic to one another, and they had little space to move around. Fortunately the allergies, though relatively extreme, were not lethal. Unfortunately, the allergy involved red spots, nausea, scratching and sneezing, making standing up much harder. Fortunately, after such a long time, they all decided to sit on the eight chairs nearby. Unfortunately there were really only 7 chairs, and so one died by sitting on nothing and being sucked into the Nzone. Fortunately, the dead do not depart too hastily, and a raven crowed and a man in black came a' walkin'. Unfortunately the raven traded the life for another, so the net amount of dead people was the same.
Fortunately, the raven was from a mirror universe, so, when it tried to kill another person, it, instead, transformed him (Or her) in a nigh-omnipotent superhero, and, disappointed, the raven wandered back to the nightly plutonian shore (quoth the raven, "Nevermore!"). Unfortunately, one of the men yelled "Be that word our sign of parting, Bird or Fiend!" as the Raven disappeared; however, as he yelled his balance dropped on that precipice so high, so hard; he fell hard and fast and was gone in a flash; to that place far down within the dim west where all the good and the bad and the worst and the best have gone for their eternal rest.
Fortunately the six remaining had a nice meal for dinner. Unfortunately, one of the six didn't like the dinner and annoyed the other ones with speaking badly and in a completely inappropriate language about it. Fortunately the language was inappropriate only by formal view, so it wasn't all that foul. Unfortunately, in this realm you literally ate your words, hence the seventh person ate nothing but nonsense. Fortunately there was no nonsense to be eaten since there was not seventh person, there was something to eat though. Unfortunately, this "something to eat" was largely composed of raw rabbit ribs. Fortunately raw rabbit ribs were quiet delicious, especially the nutritious marrow. Unfortunately, everyone that ate the raw meat contracted cysticercosis. Fortunately only one person got a fatal case.
Unfortunately the other five still got incredibly sick. Fortunately, one of them was a doctor. Unfortunately the doctor didn't have the needed medical drugs for curing the illness. Fortunately nature eventually led its path and they eventually all got better. Unfortunately, some greater force decided that they all can't feel better and made three of them break all their limbs. Fortunately they were all just sitting around, so they didn't care much about the loss. Unfortunately, after some time they felt the need for going to the toilet, which made them suddenly care very much about the loss. Fortunately, Some Greater Force decided that it wouldn't like to see all those grown people peeing themselves, fixed their bones and created a bathroom out of thin air. Unfortunately, no one wants to see anyone using bathrooms made of thin air, so they decided not to use it.
Fortunately, while very pissed at this, Some conceded a bathroom made of thick air to the whiny bastards. Unfortunately piping wasn't made. Fortunately, the now not-crippled people didn't know that, and the ground of that particular location was very permeable. Unfortunately this meant that as soon as the first person who entered the room, he fell through the floor.
Rule of 3Edit
Fortunately this hardened up the soil. Unfortunately, this also made the soil less permeable, and, after they were done the smell began to intoxicate them. Fortunately there was a visine for that. Unfortunately, the smell would take a long time to fade, and prolonged use of visine can permanently dilate blood vessels. Fortunately, 3 of them were given gas masks. Unfortunately one of the gas masks was broken. Fortunately the one wearing the broken gas mask turned out to be immune against the smell. Unfortunately, it still had a strange adverse effect of making him go crazy! Fortunately there was an isolation room. Unfortunately, it was on the other side of a weak bridge, that probably would only support the weight of one person. Fortunately there was no need to use the bridge because it only bridged a small rill, so there was no problem to get to the other side. Unfortunately, none of the last three sentences helped the crazy person. Fortunately a 2 on 1 brawl ended with the isolation room being filled. Unfortunately, the room blew up, for reasons that are best to remain undisclosed. Fortunately noone got hurt. Unfortunately for Mr. Noone, who had been hurt badly. Fortunately, three of the other five thought that they could live better if Mr. Noone was out of the picture. Unfortunately, the other five were too dead to live better off without Mr. Noone. Fortunately, Mr. Noone didn't care if dead people would live better off without him. Unfortunately everyone was obviously getting some serious intoxication since they thought there were 5 people when there was only 3. Fortunately, one of the three just saved a bunch of money on his car insurance. Unfortunately this encouraged drunk joy riding and he ended up in a ginormous car crash pile up that killed a gizillion people, including himself.
Fortunately, the other two remaining people finally noticed that they were being killed off one by one by forces that they could not understand, as if the cosmos itself decided to play with their lives, allowing fortunate incidents to make them lower their guard, and following those incidents with most unfortunate ones, until they died, one by one; desperate at the unfairness of it all, the two people (mister Whoever and miss Someone) decided to do everything within their power to avert their apparently unavoidable unfortunate destiny. Unfortunately it was quite unavoidable so that all their attempts were quite vain. Fortunately at that point, mister Whoever's alarm clock rang, and he found out that it all had been just a nightmare. Unfortunately he was just day dreaming so when miss Someone smacked him for going off in a trance, he had to forget about that and worry over the looming of death. Fortunately, the looming of death was upside down in the sky, which meant death was below the horizon, and death is known for being quite slow, so they had plenty of time to escape on their sun-powered snowmobile. Unfortunately solar powered vehicles aren't all that reliable, and so they ended up stranded in the lethal environment of the tundra while escaping the grip of death. Fortunately it turned out that they stranded not far away from a train station, and the next train was to expect in about ten minutes. Unfortunately the train could only hold one person. Fortunately, due to their bad condition, Mister Whatever and Miss Someone had lost so much weight that they would count as just one person. Unfortunately Mister Whatever was the imaginary husband of Miss Someone, and the case of being a single entity was not the same for Mister Whoever and Miss Someone. Fortunately that meant they were really only one person, and therefore had no problems to get onto the train together. Unfortunately, since she suffered from multiple personality disorder, miss Someone was taken to insane asylum the second she stepped onto the train. Fortunately there were no asylums that would accept mister Whoever, who had been denied the being of an entity for some reason. Unfortunately, in that country, not being an entity was a major crime. Fortunately, in that country, cops are people that abide to the law and respect their fellow human beings, only putting people in jails when it is absolutely necessary, preferring ressocialization methods, like community work, most of times, instead of torturing prisoners. Unfortunately in that country community work was worse than torture. Fortunately mister Whoever had to be given the status of an entity to be put to work, so after some hard labor everything turned out well. Unfortunately at this point, where everything started to get pleasurable, Mister Whoever's alarm clock rang again, and he found out that the first ringing had been real, and had not actually been a day dream, but he had just immediately fallen asleep again, until now the snooze function of the alarm clock awakened him again, so he got up and went to the bath room. Fortunately, there was a party in the office, since he got promoted to assistant vice-director of the Xtreme subsection of the marketing department's overseeing operations, and Whoever made a speech and received flowers and a crown, before saying "This is the most happiest day of my life!" while crying profusely. Unfortunately miss Someone was jealous and so she became emo and committed suicide.
Fortunately, miss Someone failed in her attempt of suiciding herself, but she was still in coma for three years, and lost her baby, which made her (rather understandably) very angry, and she blamed mister Whoever for that (Not quite as understandably), so she thought of suiciding him (With a KATANA!). Unfortunately this led to mister Whoever's death and the execution of miss Someone. Fortunately, there was no one else to die, so Death could finally give it a break, eat potato chips and watch reruns of Lost.